I needed a day to myself

The title is the basic truth to it all. I.just.need.time.

But don't we all?

Orrr is it more like we need to learn how to better spend our time.

That's got to be more like it because realitsically no one can create time.

At least not at the expense on loosing out on something else.

It's not like there are points in our daily life where we zone out and do 'nothing'.

Even if we are doing 'nothing' it's a relative term to describe 'something'.

I got ready this morning to go to Mike's family reunion, by myself.

No kids (they were at their dad's)

No Mike (he was downstairs watching t.v.)

Just me.

I turned on a music channel and just did my thing.

No interuptions.

It didn't even occure to me that this was so rare until after I'd been alone for probably about 15 minutes.

I realized it because I enjoyed it.

There was no "Mom!" and there wasn't any "Wesson, no" -or- "Shawn STOP WHINNING"

No "Baby, come rub my back please"

there was nothing for me to do, besides 'me'.

I was gone too long, I guess, because Mike came to find me after some time.

He flopped himself down on the bed and asked what I was doing.

I answered confidently and honestly that I was enjoying my time alone.

Wrong thing to say.

He took that as -- "She never wants to spend time with me"

Which is very not true, but please please please someone confirm for me that time alone is just as valueable!

This annoyed me and upset me because I was having such a comfortable time just being alone that it was an insult to be generalized and made into a problem vesus a solution.

I tried to explain to him two things:

- One, I need time alone sometimes.

- Two, not every little thing is a big thing. *just because I wanted to be alone for an hour doesn't mean I wanted to be alone forever.

Of course it brough on tears and an argument. My confidence dwindled and here I sit, alone (just as I wanted) without going to the reunion.

I couldn't do it. I didn't WANT To do it. So I didn't do it.

Seems selfish and he did tell me he wouldn't be happy that I didn't go, but hopefully he understands.